What is Rapid Transformational Therapy?(RTT)

Firstly I must let you know that I am not a big fan of labels as they are too general. I have also witnessed many people thinking that they were doomed because a so called professional had diagnosed them with such and such diss-ease when in reality it was completely wrong and, feeling so relieved by that discovery.

Then there's the fact that there is many different types of narcissistic behaviours.

So what is narcissism in a person? Narcissism is an extreme way to control others. It's self-involvement to the point where that person completely ignores the needs of those around them. It's all about them getting what they want, no matter what!

A narcissistic man exhibits a pattern of grandiosity, has a huge ego, a need for admiration, and a lack of empathy. This manifests as an inflated sense of self-importance, a habit to exploit others, and a deep-seated insecurity masked by arrogance. He may also display a sense of entitlement and be manipulative in relationships. While just about anyone may have narcissistic behaviour, in my opinion, once in a while, true narcissists often disregard others or their feelings. They don't understand the effect their behaviour has on other people and they don't care.

My late husband was a Master Narcissistic without a single doubt. For 20 years, he had me in a spin... I obviously believed everything he said as he was such a brilliant mind operator. He had such great charisma. He knew exactly how to play me, what to say, when and how to get what he wanted.

And if I tried to stand up to him, he would either get very aggressive or threaten to kill himself!

You may wonder how...

For example:

- He wouldn't let me have friends as they are always the ones who end up betraying you and sleep with your husband...

- He didn't want me to work just in case I might meet someone else...

- He didn't want us to have a computer, let alone the internet, so I would not be able to meet someone else...

- He insisted on getting money from me to go and have a bet or buy his drugs, even it it was that money was meant to go towards rent or food, saying that I was lucky that he wasn't like other men who go to the pub and drink every night with their mates after work...

Basically He was a super skilled manipulator. As a professional Gigolo for 10 years before he knew me, where he practiced in the field, he had perfected his people's skills and was and extraordinary operator. This was in fact what I found extremely amazing and attractive about him and felt privileged that he had chosen me to be his wife. He was fascinating to watch as he would create things out of thin air.

On Saturday morning, for example, he would read the newspaper and check out the races columns... He would then call his mate, a barrister and say: "Hey just got a really hot tip in race 5, such and such horse, blah blah blah. Can you put a $100 on the nose for me? I'm coming over. He would then go and collect his winning and keep betting all day until it was all gone again... 

He often used tactics such as gaslighting, guilt-tripping, and playing the victim to control others, especially me to get what he wanted. 

Another time he would go and strategically place himself next to a good pray at the poker machines and play his little $20 which I had no choice to give him... 

Within minutes he would strike a conversation playing the 'poor me' card. He would tell them that he was there to win the rent money for his family. And guess what? They would give it to him.

He used to call it 'picking money from the tree'.

His manipulative behaviour caused me significant psychological harm, leading to damage to my nervous system which showed up in many different ways.

Unfortunately, this kind of trauma stays in your own personal vibrations which will cause you to attract the same kind of relationship again, over and over again unless you do some seriously deep work to release it all.

As an eternal optimistic, I kept working on myself believing that it would in turn lift him as leaving him was not an option. I chose to focus on being the best mother I could be with what I had.

And let's face it, in between events he was an amazing man, so funny, so loving and so protective of us.

Feel free to reach out and book a time to have a conversation with me.

Angelically Yours

Angelique

Men are from Mars and women are from Venus, right?

In today’s world, much is said about the pressures and challenges faced by women, but far too often, the struggles of men are overlooked or dismissed. Many men carry a silent burden — expected to be strong providers, emotionally reserved, and consistently dependable, all while suppressing their own needs and vulnerabilities. The societal pressure to “man up” or “tough it out” creates an emotional cage that leaves little room for men to express fear, sadness, or even fatigue.

Society tells men to be tough buy sensitive, stoic but emotionally available, successful but not too successful (lest they seem arrogant). They're supposed to have six-packs abs, a six-figure income and the emotional intelligence of a therapist - all while remembering to take the trash out before being asked. It's no wonder so many guys walk around looking like they just left a hostage negotiation.

One of the most common — yet rarely discussed — struggles men face is feeling undervalued. Many work tirelessly to support their families, sacrificing personal dreams, passions, and even health, but often receive little recognition or appreciation. This lack of affirmation can chip away at a man’s sense of self-worth, especially when combined with criticism or emotional withdrawal in their relationships.

And then there's the nagging. Ah yes - the melodic symphony of "Why don't you ever...?" and  "How many times do I have to tell you...?" You could be a decorated war veteran or a NASA engineer, but one "You left your socks on the floor again" can reduce a man to a confused golden retriever who just wants a snack and a nap.

Joking aside, nagging isn't just a punchline - it chips away at men's self-esteem, especially when they already feel like they're failing to meet impossible standards. This will have a massive impact on their Vagus nerve... Many aren't asking for praise every five minutes, just a little understanding, the occasional "thank you" and maybe some peace during half time.

More seriously, a growing number of men find themselves in relationships marked by narcissistic abuse — subtle manipulation, gaslighting, emotional invalidation, and control. This kind of abuse often goes unrecognised because men are expected to be emotionally invincible. Admitting that they’re being emotionally mistreated is seen by some as weakness because they've been told that real men don't complain. Spoiler alert: real men do hurt. They just often do it quietly, in the garage pretending to fix something that isn't even broken.

No one thinks of the repercussion this has in their lives...

Did you know that a lot of men become gay simply because it's easier?

Did you know that 80% of men who visit massage parlours are married?

And did you know that The incidence of suicide is vastly higher among males than females among all age groups in most of the world. As of 2015, almost two-thirds of worldwide suicides (representing about 1.5% of all deaths) are by men.

It’s time for society to acknowledge that men, too, have emotional and physical needs. That they, too, can be victims. That they deserve compassion, respect, and support — not just for what they do, but for who they are. Creating a healthier world for men doesn’t diminish the struggles of others; it simply makes space for everyone to be heard, valued, and understood.

Don't be shy to come and see me as a Rapid Transformational Therapy session will do you the world of good. It will empower you by releasing the vibrations in you that attracted the abuse in the first place and coaching will teach you how to stand up for yourself as you deserve to be respected.

I look forward to speaking with you.